Chapter 10
NEXT day the morning hours seemed to pass very slowly at M.Pelet's; I wanted the afternoon to come that I might go again tothe neighbouring pensionnat and give my first lesson within itspleasant precincts; for pleasant they appeared to me. At noonthe hour of recreation arrived; at one o'clock we had lunch; thisgot on the time, and at last St. Gudule's deep bell, tollingslowly two, marked the moment for which I had been waiting.
At the foot of the narrow back-stairs that descended from myroom, I met M. Pelet.
"Comme vous avez l'air rayonnant!" said he. "Je ne vous aijamais vu aussi gai. Que s'est-il donc passe?"
"Apparemment que j'aime les changements," replied I.
"Ah! je comprends--c'est cela-soyez sage seulement. Vous etesbien jeune--trop jeune pour le role que vous allez jouer; il fautprendre garde--savez-vous?"
"Mais quel danger y a-t-il?"
"Je n'en sais rien--ne vous laissez pas aller a de vivesimpressions--voila tout."
I laughed: a sentiment of exquisite pleasure played over mynerves at the thought that "vives impressions" were likely to becreated; it was the deadness, the sameness of life's dailyongoings that had hitherto been my bane; my blouse-clad "eleves"in the boys' seminary never stirred in me any "vives impressions"except it might be occasionally some of anger. I broke from M.Pelet, and as I strode down the passage he followed me with oneof his laughs--a very French, rakish, mocking sound.
Again I stood at the neighbouring door, and soon was re-admittedinto the cheerful passage with its clear dove-colour imitationmarble walls. I followed the portress, and descending a step,and making a turn, I found myself in a sort of corridor; aside-door opened, Mdlle. Reuter's little figure, as graceful asit was plump, appeared. I could now see her dress in fulldaylight; a neat, simple mousseline-laine gown fitted her compactround shape to perfection--delicate little collar and manchettesof lace, trim Parisian brodequins showed her neck, wrists, andfeet, to complete advantage; but how grave was her face as shecame suddenly upon me! Solicitude and business were in her eye--on her forehead; she looked almost stern. Her "Bon jour,monsieur," was quite polite, but so orderly, so commonplace, itspread directly a cool, damp towel over my "vives impressions."The servant turned back when her mistress appeared, and I walkedslowly along the corridor, side by side with Mdlle. Reuter.
"Monsieur will give a lesson in the first class to-day," saidshe; "dictation or reading will perhaps be the best thing tobegin with, for those are the easiest forms of communicatinginstruction in a foreign language; and, at the first, a masternaturally feels a little unsettled."
She was quite right, as I had found from experience; it onlyremained for me to acquiesce. We proceeded now in silence. Thecorridor terminated in a hall, large, lofty, and square; a glassdoor on one side showed within a long narrow refectory, withtables, an armoire, and two lamps; it was empty; large glassdoors, in front, opened on the playground and garden; a broadstaircase ascended spirally on the opposite side; the remainingwall showed a pair of great folding-doors, now closed, andadmitting: doubtless, to the classes.
Mdlle. Reuter turned her eye laterally on me, to ascertain,probably, whether I was collected enough to be ushered into hersanctum sanctorum. I suppose she judged me to be in a tolerablestate of self-government, for she opened the door, and I followedher through. A rustling sound of uprising greeted our entrance;without looking to the right or left, I walked straight up thelane between two sets of benches and desks, and took possessionof the empty chair and isolated desk raised on an estrade, of onestep high, so as to command one division; the other divisionbeing under the surveillance of a maitresse similarly elevated.At the back of the estrade, and attached to a moveable partitiondividing this schoolroom from another beyond, was a large tableauof wood painted black and varnished; a thick crayon of whitechalk lay on my desk for the convenience of elucidating anygrammatical or verbal obscurity which might occur in my lessonsby writing it upon the tableau; a wet sponge appeared beside thechalk, to enable me to efface the marks when they had served thepurpose intended.
I carefully and deliberately made these observations beforeallowing myself to take one glance at the benches before me;having handled the crayon, looked back at the tableau, fingeredthe sponge in order to ascertain that it was in a right state ofmoisture, I found myself cool enough to admit of looking calmlyup and gazing deliberately round me.
And first I observed that Mdlle. Reuter had already glided away,she was nowhere visible; a maitresse or teacher, the one whooccupied the corresponding estrade to my own, alone remained tokeep guard over me; she was a little in the shade, and, with myshort sight, I could only see that she was of a thin bony figureand rather tallowy complexion, and that her attitude, as she sat,partook equally of listlessness and affectation. More obvious,more prominent, shone on by the full light of the large window,were the occupants of the benches just before me, of whom somewere girls of fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, some young women fromeighteen (as it appeared to me) up to twenty; the most modestattire, the simplest fashion of wearing the hair, were apparentin all; and good features, ruddy, blooming complexions, large andbrilliant eyes, forms full, even to solidity, seemed to abound.I did not bear the first view like a stoic; I was dazzled, myeyes fell, and in a voice somewhat too low I murmured--
"Prenez vos cahiers de dictee, mesdemoiselles."
Not so had I bid the boys at Pelet's take their reading-books. Arustle followed, and an opening of desks; behind the lifted lidswhich momentarily screened the heads bent down to search forexercise-books, I heard tittering and whispers.
"Eulalie, je suis prete a pamer de rire," observed one.
"Comme il a rougi en parlant!"
"Oui, c'est un veritable blanc-bec."
"Tais-toi, Hortense--il nous ecoute."
And now the lids sank and the heads reappeared; I had markedthree, the whisperers, and I did not scruple to take a verysteady look at them as they emerged from their temporary eclipse.It is astonishing what ease and courage their little phrases offlippancy had given me; the idea by which I had been awed wasthat the youthful beings before me, with their dark nun-likerobes and softly braided hair, were a kind of half-angels. Thelight titter, the giddy whisper, had already in some measurerelieved my mind of that fond and oppressive fancy.
The three I allude to were just in front, within half a yard ofmy estrade, and were among the most womanly-looking present.Their names I knew afterwards, and may as well mention now; theywere Eulalie, Hortense, Caroline. Eulalie was tall, and veryfinely shaped: she was fair, and her features were those of aLow Country Madonna; many a "figure de Vierge" have I seen inDutch pictures exactly resembling hers; there were no angles inher shape or in her face, all was curve and roundness--neitherthought, sentiment, nor passion disturbed by line or flush theequality of her pale, clear skin; her noble bust heaved with herregular breathing, her eyes moved a little--by these evidences oflife alone could I have distinguished her from some largehandsome figure moulded in wax. Hortense was of middle size andstout, her form was ungraceful, her face striking, more alive andbrilliant than Eulalie's, her hair was dark brown, her complexionrichly coloured; there were frolic and mischief in her eye:consistency and good sense she might possess, but none of herfeatures betokened those qualities.
Caroline was little, though evidently full grown; raven-blackhair, very dark eyes, absolutely regular features, with acolourless olive complexion, clear as to the face and sallowabout the neck, formed in her that assemblage of points whoseunion many persons regard as the perfection of beauty. How, withthe tintless pallor of her skin and the classic straightness ofher lineaments, she managed to look sensual, I don't know. Ithink her lips and eyes contrived the affair between them, andthe result left no uncertainty on the beholder's mind. She wassensual now, and in ten years' time she would be coarse--promiseplain was written in her face of much future folly.
If I looked at these girls with little scruple, they looked at mewith still less. Eulalie raised her unmoved eye to mine, andseemed to expect, passively but securely, an impromptu tribute toher majestic charms. Hortense regarded me boldly, and giggled atthe same time, while she said, with an air of impudent freedom--
"Dictez-nous quelquechose de facile pour commencer, monsieur."
Caroline shook her loose ringlets of abundant but somewhat coarsehair over her rolling black eyes; parting her lips, as full asthose of a hot-blooded Maroon, she showed her well-set teethsparkling between them, and treated me at the same time to asmile "de sa facon." Beautiful as Pauline Borghese, she looked atthe moment scarcely purer than Lucrece de Borgia. Caroline wasof noble family. I heard her lady-mother's character afterwards,and then I ceased to wonder at the precocious accomplishments ofthe daughter. These three, I at once saw, deemed themselves thequeens of the school, and conceived that by their splendour theythrew all the rest into the shade. In less than five minutesthey had thus revealed to me their characters, and in less thanfive minutes I had buckled on a breast-plate of steelyindifference, and let down a visor of impassible austerity.
"Take your pens and commence writing," said I, in as dry andtrite a voice as if I had been addressing only Jules Vanderkelkovand Co.
The dictee now commenced. My three belles interrupted meperpetually with little silly questions and uncalled-for remarks,to some of which I made no answer, and to others replied veryquietly and briefly. "Comment dit-on point et virgule en Anglais,monsieur?"
"Semi-colon, mademoiselle."
"Semi-collong? Ah, comme c'est drole!" (giggle.)
"J'ai une si mauvaise plume--impossible d'ecrire!"
"Mais, monsieur--je ne sais pas suivre--vous allez si vite."
"Je n'ai rien compris, moi!"
Here a general murmur arose, and the teacher, opening her lipsfor the first time, ejaculated--
"Silence, mesdemoiselles!"
No silence followed--on the contrary, the three ladies in frontbegan to talk more loudly.
"C'est si difficile, l'Anglais!"
"Je deteste la dictee."
"Quel ennui d'ecrire quelquechose que l'on ne comprend pas!"
Some of those behind laughed: a degree of confusion began topervade the class; it was necessary to take prompt measures.
"Donnez-moi votre cahier," said I to Eulalie in an abrupt tone;and bending over, I took it before she had time to give it.
"Et vous, mademoiselle-donnez-moi le votre," continued I, moremildly, addressing a little pale, plain looking girl who sat inthe first row of the other division, and whom I had remarked asbeing at once the ugliest and the most attentive in the room; sherose up, walked over to me, and delivered her book with a grave,modest curtsey. I glanced over the two dictations; Eulalie's wasslurred, blotted, and full of silly mistakes--Sylvie's (such wasthe name of the ugly little girl) was clearly written, itcontained no error against sense, and but few faults oforthography. I coolly read aloud both exercises, marking thefaults--then I looked at Eulalie:
"C'est honteux!" said I, and I deliberately tore her dictationin four parts, and presented her with the fragments. I returnedSylvie her book with a smile, saying--
"C'est bien--je suis content de vous."
Sylvie looked calmly pleased, Eulalie swelled like an incensedturkey, but the mutiny was quelled: the conceited coquetry andfutile flirtation of the first bench were exchanged for ataciturn sullenness, much more convenient to me, and the rest ofmy lesson passed without interruption.
A bell clanging out in the yard announced the moment for thecessation of school labours. I heard our own bell at the sametime, and that of a certain public college immediately after.Order dissolved instantly; up started every pupil, I hastened toseize my hat, bow to the maitresse, and quit the room before thetide of externats should pour from the inner class, where I knewnear a hundred were prisoned, and whose rising tumult I alreadyheard.
I had scarcely crossed the hall and gained the corridor, whenMdlle. Reuter came again upon me.
"Step in here a moment," said she, and she held open the door ofthe side room from whence she had issued on my arrival; it was aSALLE-A-MANGER, as appeared from the beaufet and the armoirevitree, filled with glass and china, which formed part of itsfurniture. Ere she had closed the door on me and herself, thecorridor was already filled with day-pupils, tearing down theircloaks, bonnets, and cabas from the wooden pegs on which theywere suspended; the shrill voice of a maitresse was heard atintervals vainly endeavouring to enforce some sort of order;vainly, I say: discipline there was none in these rough ranks,and yet this was considered one of the best-conducted schools inBrussels.
"Well, you have given your first lesson," began Mdlle. Reuter inthe most calm, equable voice, as though quite unconscious of thechaos from which we were separated only by a single wall.
"Were you satisfied with your pupils, or did any circumstance intheir conduct give you cause for complaint? Conceal nothing fromme, repose in me entire confidence."
Happily, I felt in myself complete power to manage my pupilswithout aid; the enchantment, the golden haze which had dazzledmy perspicuity at first, had been a good deal dissipated. Icannot say I was chagrined or downcast by the contrast which thereality of a pensionnat de demoiselles presented to my vagueideal of the same community; I was only enlightened and amused;consequently, I felt in no disposition to complain to Mdlle.Reuter, and I received her considerate invitation to confidencewith a smile.
"A thousand thanks, mademoiselle, all has gone very smoothly."
She looked more than doubtful.
"Et les trois demoiselles du premier banc?" said she.
"Ah! tout va au mieux!" was my answer, and Mdlle. Reuter ceasedto question me; but her eye--not large, not brilliant, notmelting, or kindling, but astute, penetrating, practical, showedshe was even with me; it let out a momentary gleam, which saidplainly, "Be as close as you like, I am not dependent on yourcandour; what you would conceal I already know."
By a transition so quiet as to be scarcely perceptible, thedirectress's manner changed; the anxious business-air passed fromher face, and she began chatting about the weather and the town,and asking in neighbourly wise after M. and Madame Pelet. Ianswered all her little questions; she prolonged her talk, I wenton following its many little windings; she sat so long, said somuch, varied so often the topics of discourse, that it was notdifficult to perceive she had a particular aim in thus detainingme. Her mere words could have afforded no clue to this aim, buther countenance aided; while her lips uttered only affablecommonplaces, her eyes reverted continually to my face. Herglances were not given in full, but out of the corners, soquietly, so stealthily, yet I think I lost not one. I watchedher as keenly as she watched me; I perceived soon that she wasfeeling after my real character; she was searching for salientpoints, and weak; points, and eccentric points; she was applyingnow this test, now that, hoping in the end to find some chink,some niche, where she could put in her little firm foot and standupon my neck--mistress of my nature, Do not mistake me, reader,it was no amorous influence she wished to gain--at that time itwas only the power of the politician to which she aspired; I wasnow installed as a professor in her establishment, and she wantedto know where her mind was superior to mine--by what feeling oropinion she could lead me.
I enjoyed the game much, and did not hasten its conclusion;sometimes I gave her hopes, beginning a sentence rather weakly,when her shrewd eye would light up--she thought she had me;having led her a little way, I delighted to turn round and finishwith sound, hard sense, whereat her countenance would fall. Atlast a servant entered to announce dinner; the conflict beingthus necessarily terminated, we parted without having gained anyadvantage on either side: Mdlle. Reuter had not even given me anopportunity of attacking her with feeling, and I had managed tobaffle her little schemes of craft. It was a regular drawnbattle. I again held out my hand when I left the room, she gaveme hers; it was a small and white hand, but how cool! I met hereye too in full--obliging her to give me a straightforward look;this last test went against me: it left her as it found her--moderate, temperate, tranquil; me it disappointed.
"I am growing wiser," thought I, as I walked back to M. Pelet's."Look at this little woman; is she like the women of novelistsand romancers? To read of female character as depicted in Poetryand Fiction, one would think it was made up of sentiment, eitherfor good or bad--here is a specimen, and a most sensible andrespectable specimen, too, whose staple ingredient is abstractreason. No Talleyrand was ever more passionless than ZoraideReuter!" So I thought then; I found afterwards that bluntsusceptibilities are very consistent with strong propensities.